I am paralyzed by the dirty dishes

in the same way
that some personalities
freeze in hostage situations
the clutter constitutes
too much visual input
and I have lost my
data processing capabilities
as if the house
has folded on top of me
black and thick
a mat of confusion
with dusting
repairing
cleaning
cooking
holding
healing
teaching
loving
and merry making
my primary seasonal duties

going unperformed
as I sit banded and blinded
I can no longer see
a section of my brain relays
a repeated message
—External connections
to critical data inputs
severed—Back up systems
fail restore—reboot
system and clear cache
If there was more cash
and time for processing
I could overcome
my own objections
at this point
I have blue screened.